I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
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