Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize