So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Randomize
