Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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