i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize
