She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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