Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Randomize