He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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