hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
