Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
