I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Randomize
