I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
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