If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
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