Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize