dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
