Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Randomize
