:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
