i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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