found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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