You're so nebulous sometimes
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
