Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize