Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
