Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize
