yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
