please come you make the beer taste better
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
