I can't watch pbs sober anymore
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Randomize