Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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