just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
fuck your aforementioned shoe
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Randomize
