I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Randomize
