sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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