you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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