I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Randomize