You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
then he tried to convert me to islam
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I'm just crazy horny about you
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize
