my phone cant type all the emotion im having
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
