i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
