I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I need to calm my uterus...
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Randomize
