another moral hangover. fuck.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
