She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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