Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Randomize
