his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I have aggressive nipples.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
