Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
