Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Randomize
