My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
I'm gonna have a badass scar
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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