she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Randomize
