I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Randomize
