Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize