Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
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