my room smells like sperm. sweet.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
