Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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