He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
no. you can't hotbox the world.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
