what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
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