my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
