question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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