Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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